There is a perfectly valid and sane reason why I've decided to omit you guys from my life...



Sadly I'm confident that, selfish beings that you are, you won't bother knowing that I did it.



What's even sadder? You won't bother knowing why it had to be that way.


.

It doesn't take a genius to know...

...
...
...


... then again, I don't really care all that much. The regret still lingers, yes. But other than that... blank.



Your life, your decisions.

on the recent fiasco in the office...

It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to stand up to your friends.

It has been a very long while since I was faced with a dilemma that walloped me emotionally. This event has been one of the most disturbing and confusing ones. And to my knowledge, the first event that triggered a panic attack.

I don't know when this will all be behind me. I pray it comes soon, and it comes as a positive learning experience for all. 

forgive me father, it's been two weeks since my last full run and/or workout. my sins are (1) consuming eight beers and two shots of hard liquor as post half-marathon celebratory drink(s), coupled with (2) consumption of pork fat and grainform carbohydrates that's way over the recommended dose by a licensed medical professional.

i accept my penance of extended period of hangover over the course of a week.

bleh.

*******************

it's sad that i'm seriously contemplating resignation from this company. sans the questionnable leadership & possible management direction, it's really a great place to work in. empowered colleagues, minimal politics, cool facilities, employee-centric programs... hay. bakit pa kasi sila napili eh.

so here i am. slowly updating my CV. sending it to external contacts. sending feelers to industry connections. beginning to close my chapter with this employer.

abangan.

******************

we'll be singing at sofitel next week, back-up choir for a concert.

funfunfun!!

CamSur 2011: DizzizzIt & The Aftermath

2:00am - grumblegrumble, gotta dress up, took a hot bath, slipped into running gear, ate a breakfast of champions (banana & coffee), then proceeded to the shuttle station.

3:10am - arrived at the start point... even with the darkness, couldn't help but notice... hang daming hawt! took note of a few bib numbers, search agad pag available na race results :p

4:20am - crap kakaantok, gotta stretch, gotta stretch.

4:50am - eto na na mga eLRay Danzerz, it's warm-up time. and before you race, tirahin namin kayo ng fireworks. Matirang buhay, winner ng 21km!

5:00am-7:55am - tinamad na kong mag expound... but ang sarap tumakbo dito.

SHACKS... eez done weed da raze! And I've got the sore knees, blistered foot, and ragin appetite to prove it!

CamSur 2011: Day Zwei

lingering headache... too much beer, not enuf water... and it's only quarter to five in the afternoon...

pretty worth it though. i feel very relaxed and laid back now, a far cry from tha anxious gut feeling i had weeks prior my departure.

game 1 admu vs feu playing now. headache still there. 21km gun start in 12 hours.


must. find. hangover cure.

CamSur 2011: Day Uno

... wonder if writing this under the influence of 1 and 3/4's of two 500ml bottles of red Horse helps... oh well.

toucched down in CamSur aorund just befor 2pm. settled in a pretty cozy room that we'll try to work 4 peepz into (no towels i see, had to walk back to the reception area to adk). not many runners prssent yet, coach rio in between manning the reg table and watching some nba game. spent some time "carbo loading" with a double patty burger, makes for nice company with the 1 and 3/4ths of two 500ml bottles of red horse i ordered.

just at the tail end of the low pressure area in the bicol region. humid, wet ground, and sunshine on my nape.

life is good once more.


let's run.

Quick McDo Post

... just a few days to go, and it's 21km nirvana-followed-by-days-of-aching-joints-&-possible-dead-toe-nails.

i loves it anywayz. makes me feel alive. and its just me versus the asphalt & bouts of lactic acid & side stitches.

though i've 3 other companions to look after though.

and there'll be throngz of runnerz to look at... but no touch :p


4 days away from manila. well deserved.

CAN'T WAIT!!

Road to CamSur 2011 Prep: Blister Prevention

Road to CamSur 2011 Prep:

There's a lot you can do to prevent runner's knee. You should:

• Keep your thigh muscles strong and limber with regular stretching (forgot to do this... oops)
• Use orthotics -- inserts for your shoes -- if you have flat feet or other foot problems that may lead to runner's knee.
• Make sure your shoes have enough support.
• Avoid running on hard surfaces, like concrete (good luck with that!)
• Stay in shape and keep a healthy weight (check na check)
• Never abruptly increase the intensity of your workout. Make changes slowly (errr... trying)
• Wear a knee brace while exercising, if you have had runner's knee before.
• Buy quality running shoes and discard them once they lose their shape or the sole becomes worn or irregular (sana may budget)

Dear Void ver. 9/10/11,

unusual coincidental date stamp you got going. chatted with yet another headless netizen. thankfully, he seemed to have a level-minded wit about him. questionned why i was using the app, inquisitive about the state and keel of my relationship. threw back the words of wisdom i already thought of, though opted to compromise for an evenly-shared happiness.

this happiness is far from fairy tale or folk lore. but it's far more worth than either the compromises many have made, or the selfishness others choose to practice.


enough of this, i've got to train early tomorrow morning.

good night yet again, void.

Revelations

the weekend proved to be quite fulfilling. got to catch-up with a faraway friend whom i've only traded nice online messages with for almost a year. hung out in some watering hole in the metro. exchanged updates about the humdrum parts. eventually segued into that oh-so-familiar topic.

learned about something new with a certain couple (or menage?).

now, had events played out in the ideal scenario, i would've been concerned & reacted differently.


but things didn't turn out the way i'd hoped.

and so after hearing the news... i didn't give a flying fuck.

make sure to stay away from that walking time bomb.

move Me, just like Jagger

Let's dance baby...

wala talaga. arrival, departure, ticketing, customs... ganda-ganda talaga iloilo airport!

My (dad's) Roots

the boo arranged for a lightning trip to iloilo. my first time to be here, on my 3rd day in already. some thoughts...

• by far, the nicest airport-area setup i've seen. actual airport was small but sleek. the land surrounding it was spacious with lush greenery. the neighborhood was spaced far apart... well, until you get closer to the city center.

• the hunt for the elusive KBL (kadyos, baboy, langka) is still on. versus pancit molo, this takes the cake for me. seems they consider this more as a home-prepared, home-cooked, home-eaten meal. grrrrrr...

• while on that hunt: roberto's for jumbo siopao, deco's for la paz batchoy, breathrough & tatoy's for native lechon chicken (not recommended) and the beach scenery (pwede na, but there are better areas ata), peppy thai deli for sotong and shrimp goreng (saraaaaaaap)...

• waiting for boo to check out of smallville.

• next destination: Guimaras!!

been 3 days since my last run... not as painful anymore. but craving for carbs still pretty much there. augh. will prolly hit the gym later, light run or cycling, then back to upper body torture session.

KK blogging session now, though just near the office this time around. turned off already with job prospects at work. keeping busy polishing my resume and online profiles. and not f*cking up my current tasks.

life is blah.

8/20 prep to 8/21 run

• lack of gym activity, replaced by major dust clean-up of bathroom

• afternoon coffee & leche flan hang out with mah boo

• impulse purchase of one snazzy puma jacket

• gaz refill and tyre check for mazda3... should've had water checked too

• hour-long wait for the boyz in some karaoke place

• Rise of the Planet of the Apes is a really good movie. but it's a f*cking depressing one too.

• Two bottles of Red Horse beer after an ethically challenged work day is a good thing.

• A Krispy Kreme doughnut does indeed deliver that melts-in-your-mouth sensation.

• If I weren't partnered right now, I'd take the first flight out to Singapore. Or Australia. Or New Zealand. And I'd never come back.

• Having a partner makes you appreciate the smaller things in life.

Sure life's like a roller coaster full of ups and downs and plateaus and corkscrews and dips and whathaveyou...

... and don't get me wrong, I try to be grateful for the things that are going right my way...

... but either it's yet another disappointment, or a turn for the unexpected.



I'm not needy. I am definitely not greedy.



C'mon!!!!!!